
Infidelity is not something that should be condoned, but it is understood that it's unfortunately a reality of life. People cheat, get cheated on and a lot of times get caught cheating. Therefore, the name of the game is to learn from your mistakes and be a better jump-off.
See, if you choose to walk an adulterous path, you have to be smart about it. Most importantly, you have to stay in pocket. Who knows - maybe if you follow these rules you can go from just a sidepiece to a centerpiece!
The only thing worse than cheating is getting caught cheating, so do your lover a favor and help him or her avoid the drama that comes with getting caught. At the end of the day, it's probably you who will end up alone, so why not make life easier on yourself and your lover by keeping him or her in good standing with his main squeeze?
Besides, if you can't follow the rules, you always have the option of dating someone single...
1. Don't Just Watch 'CSI' - Study It
Evidence is only admissible if it's discovered. So don't be sloppy and leave a trail of betrayal. You might think it's a way to "keep" him/her for good, but being found out can lead to more headache than the person is worth. Clean up everything, including yourself, and dispose of any telltale signs immediately - preferably somewhere far from home.
2. Don't Kiss & Tell
The best secrets are the ones that are actually, you know, kept. As much as you'd like to share your secret life with your close friend(s), the less people that know about your affair, the better. Loose lips sink (relation)ships.
3. No Pictures, Please
Only people in serious relationships need visual souvenirs of a special moment together. Those on the creep need to steer clear of any flashing lights as much as possible - whether you're the cheater or the side piece. The same goes for sex tapes and sexts. Getting caught in the act is one thing; recording it for prosperity is just plain dumb.
4. Social Media is Not Your Friend
You never realize how small the world is until you sign on to Facebook. Chances are you have only a few degrees of separation between yourself and your man/woman's significant other, but try to resist the urge to friend them and snoop in their business. Keep your digital footprints as light as possible.
5. Better Safe Than Sorry
This should go without saying, but using protection is a must - cheater or not. Whether it's an unwanted pregnancy or a STD/STI, if you love your lover, the last thing you want to do is have them explain to their family why they just got booked to appear on Maury.

Public displays of affection are a major no-no. His or her main squeeze may be out of town, but their friends might not. The last thing you need is for them to get caught out there because you wanted to reach out and touch someone that isn't your official partner.
7. Feelings Are Overrated
The only feelings allowed in an affair are the ones that make you feel good, so shelve all talk of forging a deeper connection. As for the L-word, they probably have love for you but you're fooling yourself if you think they're in love.
8. Don't Call Them, They'll Call You... When They Feel Like It
The reason most people get caught cheating is because of a phone call. Either they keep ignoring a call that raises suspicion or their side piece calls and the BF/GF/husband/wife answers. That's why you need to limit contact and understand the boundaries of his/her designated "no-calls-allowed time".
9. Holidays Are Tricky
Any seasoned cheater knows that having to work late is the failsafe excuse for creeping, but that goes out the window when they have a day off. If he/she's been MIA from family throughout the week, the official lover is going to want some quality time while you, the part-time lover, take a backseat. Unless you want to raise suspicion, major holidays and anniversaries should be spent with the main squeeze and side piece appreciation days can be scheduled for a later date.
10. Three's Company; More's a Crowd
Some people just don't know how to quit when they're ahead. If your co-conspirator has managed to juggle you and their main squeeze successfully by following the above rules, there may come a point where they get cocky and try to add a fourth (or more) person into your adulterous mix. It's bad enough you're already splitting their time with someone else; don't allow yourself to get played any further because they want to be greedy!
Are you a side piece? Tell us your rules!
Anslem Samuel is the founder of the award-winning sex and relationship blog Naked With Socks On.


Comments: (41)
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By: jackie on 2/21/2011 5:16PM
that's what i'm talking about!!!!
^5
(we won't mention how you had to make it all the way to the bedroom before you stopped and just be proud of you for stopping right lol lol j/k)
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By: Doing th thing on 2/19/2011 8:39PM
Dam, these days you almost have to be a detective. "If he got a woman home that is so content (full of herself) you could get sucked in before you find out he's already take! "some of these brothers, N sisters got it down to a fine art!! "I learned the hard way, got to be more vareful!!!
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By: Doing the thing on 2/19/2011 8:48PM
It's not right , but it happens all the time! And sometime its our fault! "women have to realize yes you got married, your now a mother, we have a lot on our plate, "However we must do our part to keep our mate happy, I beleive that if he or she is being well taken care of at home. There is no reason for our mate to stray! "Sometime the thrill is gone because we let it "GO!"
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By: jackie on 2/19/2011 9:06PM
the operative word there is WE. it takes two to keep the fires burning.
just because you feel unappreciated is not reason enough for you to sneak and lie...cause my daughters to believe they aren't worthy of having a man honor his commitment...or my son to think it's ok to not be true to his word.
stand up and say i gotta go. hurt now but not as much as learning our whole relationship is a lie later and ruining future generations.
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By: jackie on 2/19/2011 8:49PM
and i think of the money. if my spouse is out there spending the money i need to buy the milk or to get the car fixed...wth does that say about him? not much in my opinion. mofo
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By: inhisimage on 2/19/2011 9:49PM
DimePiece
I TOTALLY AGREE WITH YOU. This is a TERRIBLE ARTICLE. Why would anyone set rules when the only rule there should be is THY SHALLL NOT COMMIT ADULTERY.
Its as if our society finds ADULTERY acceptable when in fact it is not nor never will be in the eyes of GOD. Holy Matrimony is a holy sworn vow between two people before GOD and is SACRED. To then go commit ADULTERY says that both individuals lacks integrity and have no morals.
Our families are being destroyed because of ones selfish and lustful behavior. We should not encourage it.
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By: "DimePiece" on 2/20/2011 2:01AM
THANK YOU! What would GOD say to this mess? Do you know HOW ANGERY HE IS? I'm tellin you, these are the LAST DAYS! Those who think it's right & still doin it will not have no long term happiness, love, and ETERNAL LIFE WITH THE FATHER.
Look, people better wake up or it's going to be too LATE! This is not ACCEPTABLE!
PEACE! :-)
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By: GAL on 2/19/2011 9:51PM
My first time noticing BV on AOL, I clicked on BLACK VOICES, read this article and I was truly disappointed. :(
My opinion, people don't have to cheat. If one does not want to be in a monogamous relationship, then don't be. Just be honest. Don't get married or commit to a monogamous relationship because you want to keep your significant other on lock down, while you do your thing. I think people who cheat are usually selfish, they want to play, however, they don't want their partner to play.
Having multiple partners is okay, as long as everyone is on the same page, (NO ONE SHOULD BE LIED TO) and safe sex is being practiced.
Just my two cents.
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By: Mariposa on 2/19/2011 9:38PM
I'm thinking why this was even displayed as glorifying infedelity. I was hoping that there would be some semblance of morality throught this entire article..wow! was I wrong. This was truly a waste of paper and my two minutes it took to read it. It also makes the person who is not the "side piece" even more disgusted that you took pleasure in writing this.
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By: Norma on 2/22/2011 7:28AM
I like reading the comments, could not bring myself to read the article. Agree, subject was a waste of my time. BV need to give readers more credit.
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