
Who needs trashy daytime talk shows? According to the gossip blogs, R&B singer Tank doesn't. He opted to keep it 2009 style and have a public war of words with the mother of his son on Twitter instead. It was a well-thought out move, right up there with invading Iraq. To put it differently, this is the equivalent of the bird smacking into a plate-glass building; it's both humorous and head scratching. Why is a grown man on Twitter typing the following to the mother of his child (according to mediatakeout.com):
"Stop hiding who you are. Tell everybody you're my baby mama in Charlotte and you took (me) to court cause you didn't like my offer and the courts gave you less and you're very mad at me. So you send horrible emails and tweets about me when you should be somewhere trying to get a job. You're the kind of woman that gives baby mama a bad name."
(and as an encore)
"I was very drunk that night! my son wasn't a mistake though so I'll take full responsibility!!"
If the court case particulars didn't do it, certainly the "I was very drunk that night" disclaimer made you wince with disbelief. But at least he's taking "full responsibility," as I'm sure the child in question is totally cool with daddy splattering the drunken circumstances of his conception all over the Internet. Most men, I'd imagine, need some sort of Freedom of Information Act request or a subpoena to come off the salacious details. Nothing says responsibility better than Cognac confessions that spill family business into the public domain.
Listen, I have a Twitter account. The mother of my teenage son doesn't. Life is simpler this way. If she had an account, chances are, the father of her teenage son wouldn't. Never shall the twain meet online. The offline experience was sufficient.
Even if it was in response to reckless online comments made by the mother, it's never a good idea, especially for an aspiring artist, to publicly unload in this type of manner. Damn, why not take center stage, tap the mic to make sure it's on and start the show with "I hate all the baby mamas out there" right before launching into the catalog of songs that are overstuffed with sophomoric lyrics about being a sensitive man.
And more important than the abuse of Twitter is the tired tag lines of "baby mama" as well as "baby daddy." Those catchwords, along with the catchphrases "baby mama drama" or "my baby daddy's caddy" just seem so, I don't know, so 2004 to me. It was comical and convenient at one point to use the language that spawned cinematic classics like 'My Baby's Daddy,' for which I'm still miffed at at the Academy for not nominating.
Humor and Hollywood snobbery aside, it's time we put an end to the use of "baby mamas" and "baby daddies." What the hell is wrong with saying "my child's father" or "my baby's mother"? If the ethnically ambiguous henpecked dude from 'Jon & Kate Plus Eight (Equals Hate)' can refer to his former ball buster of a wife as "the mother of his children" and she refer to him as the
Let me bottom line this. Twitter, like Facebook, is for sharing news and for posting very forgettable tidbits about your life and thoughts. It's not a place to announce "@babymama I'm NOT the father of your child". There is an appropriate time and place for everything like court or The Maury Povich Show. Have respect for the other parent, regardless of circumstances, and have some respect for yourself.
Mason Jamal writes about issues pertaining to the style, substance and sensibilities of men (and sometimes women). For more of his musings, you can visit www.MasonSays.com. You can also follow him on Twitter @masonsays.


Comments: (27)
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By: E on 12/08/2009 8:29AM
She should get a job. As for the celebs: Stop having these one night stand/jumpoff/goldmine babies and you wont have to worry about the shake down. Rap it up.
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By: carla ford on 12/08/2009 11:33AM
@ E
Exactly; shut the hell Tank-clearly both you and she excercised poor judgment that night.
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By: LiberationJ on 1/26/2010 11:14PM
Why do broke men and I use word lightly men, always scream get a job. Tank is not making enough money for all three let alone one of the mother's children not work. He is clown just as sure as the sky is blue.
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By: carla ford on 12/08/2009 11:34AM
meant to say shut the hell up Tank
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By: Jai on 12/09/2009 11:44AM
Lol. Mason great article. You soooooooooo on point! Good job.
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By: Mason Jamal on 12/08/2009 1:18PM
@Jai
I appreciate that. Using Twitter, celebrity or not, to go in on the other parent of your child seems like one of the worse ideas ever, as far as public image goes. This is the "Jerry Springer-ization" of our culture permeating all corners of the public space including social networks. People need to know it's not okay and getting the last word doesn't mean you won. Both parties lose...actually all three parties lose when you include the child, who should be the first concern.
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By: sharkchops on 12/08/2009 12:04PM
.....and keep your private business OFF the internet.
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By: jean on 12/08/2009 12:53PM
Simple sollution, keep your pants up and your zipper zipped this way your third leg is under control or keep your dress tail down and your panties up and you won't produce any drama or deal with mama drama trauma.
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By: Goddess Intellect on 12/08/2009 2:03PM
"I was very drunk that night! my son wasn't a mistake though so I'll take full responsibility!!"
This disturbs the hell out of me. He not only disrespected the woman who carried his child in her womb (even tho she may not be capable of earning any kind of respect)but he has disrespected his son infront of millions?thousands?
By mixing drunk & son in a public announcement he has reduced his child to a mere object. I dont care what type of problems you have w who you lay down with but have some effin class. Leave the quarrels for private emails or phone calls, KEYWORD: Private
As cute as Tank is, he now looks like a little punk ass child to me who is unfit to be a parent. All this I get from one line. Twitter is the devil.
In re: to the title of BM & BD...yea I agree Mason that shit has to stop.
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By: Mason Jamal on 12/08/2009 4:16PM
@Goddess Intellect
I can always count on you to cut through the crap and recognize the stankiness of a situation.
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