I am a mother of two and my husband just lost his job with Lehman Brothers. He has been working there for two years and even though we have our savings, he doesn't think he will be able to find a new job because thousands of people have been laid off. I tried to be supportive by telling him he would, but he is very depressed. What do I do to help out?
The current economic crisis in America looks bleak for the millions of people who are affected by the crash of Bear Stearns, Lehman Brothers, Fannie May, Freddie Mac, Washington Mutual, Merrill Lynch, Citigroup, and AIG. Sit down with your husband and create a budget check list. It's time to tighten the reigns on your spending. You want to know exactly where your money is going so that you know how long you can support your family with your current savings. It's time to spend your money on needs only, and that means getting rid of any unnecessary spending. When you shop for needs, make sure to buy items that are on sale. This will decrease the stress on your savings, and give your family more time to find another source of income. As for your husband, let him know that you love and support him, and ask him how you can be of assistance in helping him find a new job. In a highly competitive job market it is best to stay positive and pick out the specific strengths that make you different and better than your competition. Let him know that as a family you work together, and this is a great opportunity to spend some family time bonding with each other.
My boyfriend has been unemployed for six months and doesn't seem to care whether he gets a new job or not. I am paying all the bills. Even though we have made a commitment to be together and I should be supportive, I'm tired of paying for everything. I love him and I want to be with him, but I feel like he isn't doing his part. Should I stay or go?
It is not easy being in a situation where you feel you should support the person you love, but are not receiving that same support in return. Before you decide to leave, you want to try and make it work by communicating your concerns and frustrations. This is not an ultimatum, so don't present the situation that you will leave him if he doesn't get his life in gear. Instead, approach it positively by asking him to be your hero. Let him know that you need help supporting the lifestyle you live together, and that the best way for him to do that is by contributing financially. It is time to have a candid conversation about the kind of support that you need to make this relationship work. That means clearly defining what you need from him and asking him what he needs from you so that he can gain employment. Work as a team to help him move forward in his career, and ask him to keep you informed each step of the way so that you can offer advice and help. After communicating your needs, see if he takes action and changes his approach to finding a job. If you believe he isn't trying, then you can consider moving on with your life.
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By: Envizibal Mann on 10/01/2008 8:38AM
The Senate had a Hearing on March 5, 2007, recognizing Black males and unemployment was intentional. Where is 'Unemployment to Employment' for Blackmen? When you get a chance, ask Sen. Obama about that.
Women got "Welfare to Work," but maybe it's true, that was all to whorify them? Look how many "brave" white males approach, compliment, and hug our females, there. Heck, they even date and propose to them. Not to mention, take one-on-one business trips with them, to exotic resorts.
Don't give-up or feel that bad, Blackmen. [Dis]integration sold us out! It put our financial livelihood right in "their" hands. Females, too.
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By: gloria on 10/01/2008 8:47AM
well my story is a little like the others i've worked at this car dealership for 5yrs and 9 months and just yesterday i was laid off and i was'nt the last hired i feel that that was treated unfairly because i'm a black woman and the last hired was a white boy he's only been there 1 yesr i've been there 5 i think that should have been taken into consideration but it was'nt and i do a good job for them but they still choose to let me go instead of him.l guess i'm a little bitter but l feel that l reason to be.thanks for listening i just wanted vent a little frustration and resentment
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By: Angela White on 10/01/2008 9:19AM
I was let go on my job in July 2008 as a mortgage underwriter; due to the market I have not been able to find a job in this profession. Two years ago my boyfriend stole my life savings out of my acct. I tried falling back on my degree which is in social work, but because of no experience, I'm not getting any call backs. I have no family in my state that I can depend on, and no husband or boyfriend to help me. What can I do ?
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By: The Speaker on 10/01/2008 9:54AM
Angela, stay active and hopeful.Do you know how many times I have been told I have no experience? Control your mind. A lot of times we believe in defeat and begin to think there are no options. You should look for positions in both fields that you are qaulified for. This is what you should do: 1. prepare a resume for both of your fields. For the social work degree, utilize college programs and/or community efforts that you took part in. If you are not involved in any, its okay to put a section on your resume detailing ideas for community programs. This shows that you have been thinking about making a change. And you can all ways volunteer in the community just by reading to a child or checking in on an elderly person; 2. Register with every job agency and site you can find: Olsten, Kelly Services, Manpower, Spherion etc and put your resume on hotjobs.com, monster.com etc and all ways check you newspaper. I can't remember where I read it or if I came up with it myself. In order to find a job; finding a job has to become your job; 3. I should have put this first. Pray. Pray for strength and guidance. Read the Bible girl and realize that a boyfriend is just that, a boy-friend. Also, a husband not rooted in God won't be much help either. Get yourself together girl and be Wise. A boyfriend stole your savings once be Wise not to let this happen again. Focus on getting your spirit together and controling your mind so that you can become stable in ALL aspects of your life. Jesus is love. Be safe.
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By: DIANA on 10/01/2008 10:59AM
I am unemployed i have work sesonal for a company for four years. i travel with the company, and if needed someplace else i'm alway's avaiable to go. this year here was very different for me after working upstate new york for 6 weeks straight six days per week. i was laid off as soon as we returned home other people was hired after me and they do my job. I was the receptionist/Etc. But i won't give up and nobody should.
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By: FACEMONKEY429 on 10/01/2008 4:22PM
I'VE BEEN UNEMPLOYED FOR 2YRS & THE MORE I BEAT THE BUSHES,& POUND THE PAVEMENT THE MORE FRUSTRATING LOOKING FOR EMPLOYMENT IN AMERICA HAS BECOME. THE JOB MARKET IN OHIO & ACROSS AMERICA SEEMS TO HAVE TOTALLY DRIED UP, I KEEP TELLING MYSELF TO " NEVER GIVE UP " BUT THIS FALLOUT BETWEEN THE GOVERNMENT, WALL ST.,& THE BANKS IS MAKING THE JOB SEARCH EVEN MORE HOPELESS BECAUSE YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHEN A COMPANY IS GOING TO CLOSE IT'S DOORS DUE TO PLUMMETING STOCKS, OR A BANK FORCLOSING. IF THERE ARE JOBS OUT THERE SOMEONE PLEASE LET THEM PICK UP MY RESUME & GIVE ME A CALL BECAUSE BEING UNEMPLOYED IS NOT THE BUSINESS.
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By: marjhn on 10/01/2008 1:57PM
Let me say something about the man that don't care if he works or not. That means he doesn't care anything for you because he feels that he is well taken cared of. You stop paying his part fo the bills an only pay your part. Then you will see how long before he gets up and start looking for work. Don't give him any money to support his needs and you will see that he will get tired of being broke. Another thing he could be telling you that he rather be single again and don't want to be in a relationship,because it's too much for him right now. Just as long as you provide he is going to take as long as he could to find himself a job.
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By: Princess Iris on 10/01/2008 3:24PM
After reading these articles from people & having experienced similar situations on jobs, I blame people's not only racist, but intolerant attitudes on jobs as the reason for rising unemployment. This is coming from a white woman, because I've often been around white managers who work to find loopholes, so they can get away with firing somebody for no apparent reason. They not only fire people, because of their race, but simply, because they don't blend in with their cliche of an organization. I recall a manager who always got on my case about acting apart rather than focusing on how i do my job. She had so much personal conflict with me, that it bothered her to work with me. The woman did whatever she could to get me out of her workplace. If that wasn't enough, if I simple transferred, she would pry into my business to see what damage she could do to where I went, while being on the outside. Yes, I did get fired over something totally stupid. I've also worked at countless other places where they had an issue with a Disability I had & regardless if I could perform the job, it distracted them to work with me. This hasn't only happened to me, but many others I know, black, white, whoever. I've known people who have lost their jobs, because the manager & co-workers didn't like them or had personal issues with them. Republicans claim to give these tax cuts to corporate businesses, so they can create more jobs. Well, those tax cuts aren't working, because if these corporations get all of this extra money back, where is it going? More people should be getting fired, instead of laid off.
Most states have this "At Will," employer meaning they can fire somebody, because of some personal grudge. Companies focus more on the way people are rather than being about business. We've seen a good example of that in the Washington D.C., during the 90's when Clinton was going thru that Monica Lewinsky thing. Republicans wanna raise hell about his personal affairs, when Clinton kept this country in order. Clinton was doing his job & that's what's important. This is what's been happening for the last 8 yrs., & in the past here & there. It didn't happen as much with Clinton in office, because if someone lost a job, it was easy to go back & find another one. Jobs were dime-a-dozen.
Look at what some people's intolerant attitudes & behaviors have done to the economy & this country. Certain people wish to be more occupied with a person's skin color or personality than Job performance & that's what's got us into the state we're in.
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By: Bo on 10/01/2008 4:44PM
Angela,
Can you press charges against him for stealing your money? Or does he have access to the funds? It's so hard to find a job in the mortgage industry.
Keep the faith.
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By: mr.session on 10/01/2008 5:31PM
All you have to do is trust in the lord because if you put everythang in his hands you will be taken care up always.I know because i have been in that situation i was let go but i prayed and trusted in him and the next day i went job searching and got hired on the spot.
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